Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Tossed along...

***Warning this is a tad bit lengthy and I'm definitely on a soap box, but it is my opinion.***

I feel as though I'm a boat on the sea with no anchor, mast, or compass. I have no idea where I'm going, what it is I'm going after, where I want to be, and how to get there. That may be a tad bit over dramatic. Because I do know generally what I want. I want to make people happy. Specifically women, I want women to be happy with themselves. Instead of them racing towards some ideal "happiness" that the media leads us to believe is the perfect body, perfect teeth, perfect hair, etc. I feel like the area where this is the biggest problem is the Idaho/Utah region. Why you ask? Because somewhere along the lines the large quantity of LDS people in this region have confused seeking towards a spiritual perfection with seeking towards a worldly perfection. (even if you are one who seeks towards that worldly perfection, you do not have to force others into seeking after that same "happiness". There are those of us who have different ideals, but still have them same standards.) So instead of lending a helping hand to those who are less fortunate or feel down about themselves, we tend to judge them. Because they don't wear the brands we do, they don't have perfectly manicured fingernails, they aren't tall, blonde and tan; I think you get the idea. That's why in living here I have become so down on myself. Because I do dance to the beat of a different drum than most around these parts.

I'm 22, single(I know SHOCKER), LDS, I despise harry potter, twilight and the hunger games(I find a lot of the ideals in them to be against what I believe, I know once again SHOCKING, I'm not saying you're wrong for liking them, I just choose to stay away from such media.), some of my favorite movies entail horton hears a who, the lorax (movies that teach a good moral). I have no idea what I want my profession to be and I'm not in a huge rush to figure it out (I have explored many an avenue and am not going to stop till I figure out what it is I want to do, no I'm not just going to get a degree in something I'm not going to use, because I plan on being a mommy and not working). I try my hardest to treat all those I come into contact with kindness and respect. I use manners, I say "thank you" and "you're welcome". I smile at others. Very rarely is this kindness returned while at work and out in public. I can't stand it anymore. How hard is it to be kind? I know there are many parts of my life where I can improve in being kind, especially with my family. But I try every day to leave a good impact on those I have come into contact with. I used to hide in the when it came to men treating women with little to no respect, I refuse to do this anymore. I have seen men push the lines in my own life and in my close friends. While as women, we probably shouldn't have been in the situation we were in, we still deserve the respect and kindness to be listened to and revered when we say no. We should not feel bad about ourselves, mentally, physically, or emotionally. We do not deserve to be taken for granted from anyone, men, women, friends, parents, children, and even ourselves.

Once again I am not writing this to offend anyone and the choices you have made in life, we are different, but I do want to cause you to think. How are you looking at others and the choices they have made? Maybe before opening your mouth you should look in the mirror. I know, you feel everyone should have the same ideals as you, but that's why God created this world so we could come down here live, learn and make choices for ourselves. So that person who chooses to cover their body in tattoos isn't a bad person, they just sin differently than you. They don't see those tattoos as a bad thing, they are just showing their personality, and often times showing tribute to a loved one. So while you find it distasteful, you should probably keep your comments to yourself, because I am sure that person could find something just as distasteful about you.

I know we've all heard don't judge someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes. Even then we still have no idea what they have been through, and have no room to judge them. Most people I know suffer in silence, including myself. You have no idea what someone is going through, so please just love. Help instead of hinder. I know I have plenty of room to grow in this area myself. I need to be so much better at evoking a Christ-like love for others instead of condemning and judging. I challenge you to do the same. The first place to start? In your bathroom mirror. You only judges others so harshly because of your own feelings of incompetency. Work on loving yourself, not holding yourself up to some false ideal of what perfection really is. You are beautiful, you really are, embrace it. I know we've all heard the phrase "No one will love you, if you don't love yourself first" while I don't believe this at all I do believe when when it comes to our judgements it's true. If you don't first have the respect for yourself you will never have respect for others.