Welcome to My Rollercoaster

It's crazy what can happen in a couple month's time. I feel like the last month has seemed longer than the past year has. ha ha my life. It's crazy and great all at the same time. So much of me has been changed and molded into a better person in the last little bit. It blows me away the impact people can have on your life. I moved home, and now I am back in Logan, for many many reasons mainly for the endless possibilities. From here I can take my life anywhere I can do what I want, I can live my dreams, it just took moving home to see that. Since I really don't have the desire to write out everything that I have felt, and don't have the desire to relay everything that has happened in my life, I have chosen to put up a couple Etiquette for a lady rules that have applied to my feelings, what has happened, the mistakes I have made, and part of my journey in the last little while...This is such a true statement. Sometimes it would be easier to know ahead of time what the person's role in your life is, but I am grateful for everyone that has helped me become who I am today.
You may have a life planned out of living in Idaho Falls, then decide that's not the life your supposed to live and pack up and move to Logan in less than two days. (and by you I mean me of course.)
Yes, yes it is! How pointless life would be without the rambling conversations, the deep kisses, and the strange and ever changing adventures.
This is by far one of the most important lessons I have learned in life, not just over the last couple months. There are so many people who have been nothing but amazing to me and have helped me in so many ways possible, and I am so grateful for them and the examples they are to me.

It is taking a lot of effort for me to be strong. I have realized that a lot of my dating life I have been living in fear and running away from love and what it had to offer me. Sometimes what is easier is not always better.
I am not trying to blow my own horn here, but I have had to exert an enormous amount of strength this past couple months, strength I didn't know I had in certain areas. Strength that seemed to come from no where. But I know it was the Spirit, even though I may have gone against promptings and moved home, I was able to admit I was wrong and work my way back towards where I need to be.
Definitely goes along the same lines as pretty much every other quote. I make up my mind to do something and I do it, no matter what, even when maybe I should be listening to that still small voice and throwing out the brakes. I am just happy I got a second chance at many things.
In order to stick with someone and never let them go you have to be able to break down your walls and let them in. You have to be able to trust them, and not be so terrified of falling. This one is a work in progress. I don't know that I will ever not be afraid to fall or afraid of getting hurt, but I am giving it my all to make this work.
Seriously, sitting on the couch doing absolutely nothing with you, means the world to me and that terrifies me.
Obviously I have been having a problem with fear guiding me in my life. And honestly that's a hard habit to break. Admitting I was wrong and apologizing definitely moved me towards the direction of working on what I really care about. Moving back to Logan was another step on the path. I am slowly working my way towards where I want to be, but it's taking a lot of strength, work and trust.You can't always wear make-up to make you look beautiful, you aren't always going to be a size 2, you may one day look tragically different than you did at your peak in life, so surround yourself with people who love you for you, not what you look like on the outside.
The one who is willing to communicate and work things out, no matter how much you mess things up.
If you are yourself you have nothing else to worry about, if people don't like you? Forget them! Because why would you want someone in your life who is constantly trying to change you. You should only change for you and to become better. Don't let the world tell you who you should be.
And by judging one for what they have done, you may/most likely become a hypocrite later on because you never know what life has in store for you around the corner, and how you will react.
I think this is one of the hardest things to learn. I know I still confuse the two on a daily basis.
Stop worrying about getting hurt! Just enjoy the now, and let life take the path it will. If you do get hurt, you can only learn and grow from it. Just take a chance, and really do it, put all you've got into it.
ha ha I think this saying is rather....lame for lack of a better word. But it is true. You never know what you've got until it's gone, just hope and pray you can get it back.
But hopefully you can repent of such foolish things, that people will forgive you and that you can learn and grow from your mistakes.

Now, you must realize that when I write "you" often times I am speaking to myself. Because even though I have learned many of these things it's still a constantly battle and learning situation. I have to work on it everyday.